Packing It Up..Again

Our last day in China! Tomorrow, we will begin the long journey home with an extra little person.  As I stayed up last night consoling the hurting 3 year-old, all I could think about was packing and home.  It should have felt so good to think that; but at the time, it caused worry, stress, and doubt that I would even make it. Then came thoughts about getting back into regular life...that almost made me hyperventilate.

Jason has been antsy for days...not even the gym is calming to him.  He is not the greatest traveler, and has mostly refrained from freaking out...we only had one instance; but since then, he has pulled himself together (relatively speaking!).  He has been wanting to pack the bags for the past 3 days..that's all I hear about!  I have ignored, until now...now, I'm ready to go too...to leave this place.  China may be the birth place of my daughters and I do value the history, culture, and beauty of this country...but, it is not home.  It has been difficult the past few days not to call the bellboy already and sit down in the lobby waiting for our driver with 2-3 days to go...that would be a sight!  I wonder how long it would take for the doorman or concierge to begin coaxing me out out of the lobby sofas and back to my room?  3 hours, 8 hours?  That's kind of funny to think about...

Several times this week, I wondered if Vivian would starve by the time Saturday arrived, or if her little body would start to shut down from lack of hydration and I would be flying home with a listless child in my arms. Then I might be accused of not taking good care of her...etc, etc.  Bad thoughts, go away.

I started to think about the long plane ride and how to get her through it without making everyone around us miserable...a dose of meds to make her sleep most likely...hopefully it works.  Her mouth hurts so badly that now she won't even drink.  We have to force it down her with the medicine syringe, which then causes her to scream and then makes her lips bleed terribly.  

Fellow plane passengers just don't get it.  I would love to wear a sign on my head and my back that reads "She's sick and scared...please keep your rolling eyeballs, sighs, and inconsiderate words to yourself...Even in Chinese, I know you are talking about me!"  On her first plane ride of her life (a week ago), we were seated behind a very beautiful young Chinese woman, dressed to the nines (Coach purse, Dior compact makeup, tons of ringlet curls all down her back, and an outfit that would never survive being near a child for 10 seconds).  Vivian began to freak when she needed to either put on her seat belt or let me hold her for the descent...she screeched, clawed at my face, tried to bite me...everything!  At one point, model girl turned around, took one look at the American holding the screaming Chinese baby and rolled her eyes, looking back at her flying companion 5 rows back.  At the end of the flight, I saw her complaining about us to her model-looking boyfriend...I'm sure discussing how, if they were parents, would NEVER let a child behave that way..and would have that situation under control.  Oh really?  I highly doubt that girl has ever touched a child in her life, let alone even begin to fathom what I was dealing with....my feisty self wanted to let her have it...I refrained...she wouldn't have understood my rant anyway. 

We are all very tired of hotel rooms, Vivian included.  She is most peaceful when I put on her little boots and tell her we are going out.  So, we go out for a walk or even just ride the elevator to get her mind off of her painful mouth and swallowing troubles.  We have been carrying her non-stop for over a week, as she won't walk or stand up (even in the room).  She seems so weak and achy and just flops to the floor with a scrunched up little face.  

On the last day in China, I refused to sit around, so we went out to explore.  One last park visit and a meal at the little Australian cafe got us through the day.  Strangely, packing the bags was a breeze.  I'm not sure how, but all of the items fit more nicely going home than when we came, even with adding a couple of souvenirs for the girls.

Today before we explored the park, I found more opportunities to use my translation app and realized that Vivian really knows what it is saying.  She is more relaxed when I prep her by talking with the app before we go out.  Tonight, I sat with her on the floor, determined to tell her everything that was going to happen tomorrow.  She might not understand some things, because she has never experienced them and so the words are meaningless.  But, I used very brief and precise little sentences with concepts that I knew she understood to tell her what was going on..."we will leave this place tomorrow"..."we are going home"..."we will ride an airplane"..."you need to wear your seat belt" (yeah, right)..."we will see a doctor"..."he will fix your mouth".  I then went through her picture book and described things again in Mandarin.."this is your house"..."we are going there tomorrow"..."we will leave China"..."you will see your brothers" etc.  

With all of that said, she then intently watched us pack up the bags and set them by the door.  She really did seem to understand because she acted so differently after that. She still wanted to be held, but was not crying and watched us silently, then slept the most peacefully she has in over a week.

Up bright and early in the a.m....tomorrow, Vivian will become a US citizen upon processing through Immigration in Chicago...hooray!

How Vivian feels about exploring the hotel courtyard...she wants to get out of these hotels!  She's thinking, "Wow, these people are super lazy...they don't even cook their own food or make their own beds!  My parents are lazy bums!"