Christmas in KC

The older boys found Wii games in their stockings.













Ben's excitement to get a new Ben Ten watch. Maybe now he'll let us throw away the old one that has been rotting on his wrist for the past year?










Daddy and Lydia...

The first fire of the season...beware of the pyros...

Mommy and Lydia....

Merry Christmas!

Calvin and Hobbes Tuesday, December 25, 1990

Christmas Eve at the Inn

We managed to get everyone ready for church and arrived almost
on time---it is not easy to get six people dressed up without a few tears. It was nice to be in my grandparents church again and this year they were able to go with us.




The boys and Lydia pose in front of the Inn and then the tree in the hearth room after church on Christmas Eve.










Before we put cookies out for Santa, they jumped into their jammies and headed to the game room. Jack, being the planner that he is, had brought a stash of coins and bills and was prepared to treat himself and Sam to video games and ping pong rental.


Then off to bed...it is definitely NOT easy for Santa to arrive in a hotel room, especially when they won't go to sleep...how does he do all of that in the dark???


I managed, but didn't get to sleep until almost 1 o'clock and was almost discovered by Ben. It was quite funny now that I think about it. I was prowling around on the floor like an intruder looking for the valuables (not very stealthy I might add) and a couple of times almost had to slide under the bed when I made too much noise!

What to do with the cookies so late at night...am I really supposed to eat those? I crumbled a few and discreetly disposed of the rest like usual---also difficult because my kids are snoopy. Maybe next year we should leave herbal tea and a Chipotle gift card...I'm sure Santa would be much more appreciative.

Icy Travels

As is typical for me, travel usually involves some sort of weather stress and our holiday trip to Indiana was no different...ice, ice, ice!

With each tenth of a mile, I wondered if we would be the next vehicle off the road into a ravine---there were many unfortunate folks finding themselves in that situation. Thankfully we (and my sister and parents) all made it through without incident. As we drove, I longed for sunny California and imagined myself living there again to avoid all of this winter weather...I really despise it. Maybe someday I will have sun and sand again, but for now...to be close to Grandmas and Grandpas.





Things are changing in Indiana....with each yearly trek to visit my family there are more differences. My grandparents no longer live in their little house. It is unoccupied, but still has all of their belongings. They now live in a little built-on apartment with my aunt's family. It is difficult to encounter the changes that take place with age---they are no longer spry and active, but are still quite sharp and love to see how our lives are unfolding.




Some of the changes are nice though. Instead of staying with my grandparents, we have to find other lodging now that there are so many of us. This year, we stayed in an Inn at a nearby state park. It has become a favorite place for us because the Lodge is kid friendly and is set back in the forest and hills of southern Indiana. No-frills that's for sure, but it is quaint with a feel of stepping back in time. It is actually quite a retreat, and someday I hope to curl up with a book or write by the blazing fire in the dimly lit lodge (when I am no longer chasing little ones!). Such simple dreams!







The kids posed with Smokey the Bear and found marble ramps in the game room.

Gotcha Day and a Snow Day in KC

Today is the one year anniversary of Lydia's "Gotcha Day" (or the day she was placed in our arms at the orphanage). I can hardly believe that it has been a year since she's been in our family. She is extremely happy, energetic, and strong-willed all packaged in a remarkably beautiful little girl. We are wonderfully blessed and fortunate to have her. Here she models a Christmas apron Grandma Kemper made for her.

While I'm sure other families celebrate their Gotcha Days in a very exciting way, today was a snow day here in KC and I am trying to get ready for Christmas activities, so our day is a bit lame.

Snow days revolve around costumes, cocoa, popcorn, and bascially relaxing and random play in our house. Maybe I'll get to read or write today? Probably not as all are expecting some extraordinary day because they are home from school---I believe my Mommy entertainment is usually a let-down. I did snap a few pics though. Here is the first round of costumes for the day...a strange mix of super heros and a pirate/indian?

We did manage to put together a gingerbread house without too much tragedy (prepackaged of course). As usual Dad lamented the fact that there is candy involved. Fortunately the boys were content to glue the stuff on instead of eat it. The house stayed together quite well (what is that icing anyway? I think it is really a sweet glue...Sam licked it once and I cringed at the thought of his body battling the chemical goo). I finally convinced them that we aren't going to eat the rock hard gingerbread walls that were probably manufactured last year ;-)






Christmas surprises arrived in the mail today from Gma/Gpa Kemper in the form of cold cash. That IS exciting...now they can spend the rest of the afternoon deciding what to buy...the letters to Santa continue, but strangely they never ask how to mail it to him. Jack accuses us everyday of being Santa. I ignore such ridiculous comments, acting incredulous at the thought of it. But Jason uses it as a form of entertainment...the morning commute conversation this month has revolved around Santa facts/possibilities. Jason has convinced them that Santa would most definately need nourishment besides sweets...perhaps pizza, maybe a warm and festive drink? The boys were very interested in that and now are scheming how to get him some real food. But unfortunatley we are staying at an Inn in Indiana and are unable to make this happen for poor Santa this year...cookies it will be, and not homemade either!

Christmas Concert

Tonight was the long awaited Christmas concert at the boys' school. They have been practicing for a long time and every now and then I hear snippets of Latin and Hallelujah verses ringing from my living room as they leap from a chair. The event gets better every year I believe and this year there were hardly any seats left, as the school is growing. As I watched, I was reminded of why we chose this school.

It warms my heart to hear my 6 year old singing actual Christmas songs about our Savior, rather than the cutesy songs in other school's holiday shows. And this year it was a treat to hear Sam's third grade singing an awesome Gregorian chant performed in Latin (a capella, too)...I believe a script written by David about the upcoming Savior. His class only has ten students and they did a marvelous performance!

It reminds me of the first performance we attended at his school 3 years ago when we saw the annual Shakespeare performance. We were trying to decide on a school and I was amazed at the abilities, ambition, and dedication of these young people and small group of parents---memorizing an entire Shakespearean script, the pleasant sound of young men singing in Latin, and most of all the demeanor and intellect of these young people that we witnessed in this little place....and an education encased in a Christian worldview. That night secured our decision for our kiddos to go here. We have loved it...the best teachers and dedicated families you could find in the Metro in my opinion! Anyway, wondering about a Classical Christian school? Let me know :-)

A few pics from last night (please excuse the poor lighting and strange eyes on the kids!5

Last few pics from China

Once we finally had some free time to roam around Fuling, we found a bakery. The boys were excited to find big puffy sweet treats.











During our last visit to the orphange, we were given the opportunity to plant a ginkgo tree (which symbolizes longevity) in honor of our daughters. Not many families participated as the trees were quite expensive, but we and two other families chipped in to buy a tree in honor of our "Bao Babies" Anslee, Gracie, and Lydia were the youngest girls on the trip and are from the Bao generation of babies (meaning they were in the orphanage at the same time). Bao means "treasure." Here the Cox, Kemper, and Smith guys plant our Bao tree for the girls.










Our last chance to hold babies...here Lydia and Grandma feed a newborn.

Lydia says goodbye to her nannies.

Leaving China...We Made it Home

We are home...and glad to be here! After traveling for nearly 30 hours, we pulled in the driveway at 1:00 am on Saturday night (after a quick stop at the store for coffee and milk since our fridge is bare). I wish the traveling to/from China was not so painful, then we might be eager to go more often. The flights were uneventful and thankfully everyone slept almost the entire 13 hours. We have been on so many flights and buses the last seven days that I was beginning to wonder if we would ever arrive home in one piece.

The most harrowing portion was leaving Fuling on a bus at 4:00 am on Friday. The small mountains between Fuling and Chongqing are hilly with scarey tunnels and several foggy overpass bridges. We have had an amazing bus driver who has been able to manuver that huge thing through nearly any obstacle.

As we left Fuling, I was dreading the next many hours, sitting straight up in a seat, trying to sleep, and attempting to keep the kids from freaking out. They have done an excellent job on this trip! They had several nights of empty tummies because of the exotic food, much lost sleep because of the hectic schedule, and much poking and prodding from the locals, who were trying to figure out if they were real :-)

I'm glad to be in my own bed, wash my face with clean water, and not worry to drink water from my faucet. Sam already misses China and has expressed that he wants to go back and live there. I reminded him that he is most likely missing his friends that he made and the experiences that we had, and that living ther would be MUCH different...no Chinese/English speaking guides, no new-found American friends to pal around with, no nice hotels and police escorts, and they would be expected to go to school!

Our favs of the trip:
Grandma Dolores---walking the streets of Fuling, experiencing real Chinese life (and the Wall of course).
Jason---he's not sure yet.
Me---definately the orphanage and holding the babies
Sam---the Great Wall, hanging out with new friends
Jack---the Great Wall, his new friends
Lydia---the Pandas

What we won't miss: intestines, stomach, and jellyfish tenticles for dinner; questionable water; being stared at; sitting on a bus; being lectured by an ancient Chinese man (I'm sure about us being Capitalist Pigs and The White Devil---we were moved on by apologetic locals, who tried to hush the old man...ask us about this story!); sleeping on rock hard beds; and lugging suitcases around!

We will miss: the beautiful scenery of Sichuan Province; the friendly, curious locals; cheap goods; our new friends; our guides William and Alice; and most of all, the babies of Fuling.

In all, we had an amazing trip! A trip that Lydia won't remember, but that we will tell her about often as she looks at the pictures and reads "her story." I was disappointed to not find out much more about her life before us. I had imagined that I might uncover something huge while I was there. But, I think it is best that we just live our lives here, appreciating China and Fuling, teaching Lydia what we know about her life, and admit that the rest is just unknown.

One mother actually met her daughter's foster mother while there (found her in 1 million people!) but was quickly scolded for meeting with her unsupervised and the foster mother was told to leave the woman's hotel room by the people in charge of our trip. I wonder if that "foster mother" was really the birth mom? A bit unsettling...I wonder what these government officials really know about our daughters. Perhaps they have inside info that can't be found out and thus want to keep us from trailing leads....or perhaps they are just protecting us from potential problems. Nothing can be done; it's China.

I'm content to have my little girl and just wonder about her history...while we make our own history together.

China Daily Article

From China Daily:http://www.chinadaily.com.cn/china/2008-11/24/content_7232900.htmThere are 5 pictures of the ceremony at the Ministry of Civil Affairs in Beijing.

We are in the background of two of the pics (one I am making a ridiculous face)!

Ribbon Cutting Ceremony and Mysterious Turkey!

Happy Thanksgiving from Fuling!!

Here, Lydia loves on one of the little ones.

Today was the ribbon cutting ceremony for the opening of the new orphanage...I was so happy that we got to go up there again...more time with the babies!

Here, I am chatting with a beautiful baby who has a cleft lip/palate. What a smiley thing, just a little cooing and she would brighten up and smile.

The ceremony was complete with more fanfare, speeches, and gifts for the girls. The mayor of Fuling and other city officials were there. He sat directly in front of us and at times, I saw him wipe away a tear as he watched the girls up on the stage. I truly believe that they care for the welfare of these children and are glad that we have brought them back for a visit healthy and happy. The girls were presented with a Chinese/English dictionary from the mayor and a jade pendant from Director Yang. All of the girls cut a piece of the red ribbon and released balloons.

After the ceremony, we were able to go back up and hold babies, then on to our Thanksgiving meal that they had prepared for us...turkey and fried rice. Strangely the "turkey" was pinkish and had the flavor and texture of pork...looked like ham to us! But, we were assured that it was indeed turkey because it was our Thanksgiving and we eat turkey..."comes from the leg part of the bird" we were told...the Emperor's New Clothes again! We laughed and ate it up though because it was good, no matter what it was!

Jason holds one of the cleft lip/palate babies. She was SO smiley and had beautiful eyes. Hope she will get surgery soon, but she was drinking very well out of a regular bottle and seemed very healthy.

Take a look at this beautiful little girl. We called her "the pink one" because she wore this outfit all three times we visited the orphange. As you can imagine, we couldn't put her down!

Babies!

We all took turns holding this sweet baby. What a cute chubby face! From what we gathered, this little one is not a "special needs" baby. We couldn't get enough of her! I sought her out every time we went to the orphanage...wish I could have understood what her name was. I wanted to put her in my backpack and sneak out with her---I'm sure I wouldn't have gotten far...I think that's illegal :-) But, we all wanted to take several with us....wish it was that easy.

The boys and Lydia took turns decorating the wall in the play room with some stickers that we brought.

A serious baby girl, probably 14-15 months old. This one didn't smile very much. She seemed healthy though...and what a pretty face!

A lonely soul...

We snapped this picture before leaving the orphanage today. Sadly, it is so symbolic of the life that these children live. Walking down an empty hallway, with head down, wandering through life...day after day.

The New Orphanage

We left the old orphanage through a crowd of people who had gathered outside of the gates. Most were middle age or older, watching the foreigners come out of the place with their Chinese girls. We must have been quite a sight! Especially because many people don’t even know that the orphanage exists or that’s what they say. In China, they often say what they want to hear, or what they wish to be true. One adoptive mother (who speaks Chinese and lives in Shanghai) was talking to some locals. She said her daughter was from Fuling and from the orphanage there. “Where?” they said, “Must be Chengdu or Chongqing, not Fuling, there’s no orphanage here.” and they were only standing a few winding blocks from it!! Could they be so uninformed? or just want to ignore the obvious…it’s like the Emperor’s New Clothes.


The new orphanage is located up on a small mountain with a thin winding road. The gates were large, with a tall tiled wall around the complex---no yucky food stalls and the pollution must be much less. We were welcomed by Director Yang and Vice Director Chen and trekked up the hill. The tiled building was nice, but I wasn’t too excited to see the large pretty building, I just wanted to get in there and see if I could get my hands on some babies!



We were invited into the building, given plastic footies to cover our shoes and were given free reign to wander around the baby rooms!!! We were lead first to a room of older special needs children (ages 3-4 probably, with Down Syndrome and cognitive deficits). We played with them for awhile and what characters!!! They would play little games of peek-a-boo and toss the toy, so we would pick it up, but also just wandered around with no one really watching them. Several times, we encountered one little girl wandering down the hall towards the stairs and I gently guided her back to the play room.

We were able to go all around the second floor and I finally found a room of babies! Of course the cute one immediately catch your eye, but we made sure to give attention to all of the little ones. It’s very difficult to not given too much attention only to the cuties…I can imagine what it is like for the nannies as they work with them all hours of everyday. I’m sure they have their favorites and the favs (usually cute) get the most attention. We took plenty of pictures and took turns holding “the littles”.


Jason has such pity for the kids and it is hard for him to be there, but he held babies and was the photographer. The boys ran around like goons and played with toys and special needs kids. I am proud of them that they aren’t afraid to interact with these little ones, who are so craving of attention. They have grown accustomed to being with special needs kiddos because of my job and I’m thankful that they are inclusive of differences.

I never wanted to leave there! I wanted to give hugs and rock and squeeze those little girls all night. Our guides tried to announce that it was time to wrap it up, but we mommas ignored them several times and continued to stroke baby cheeks and coo at puzzled eyes. One little one in particular I couldn’t put down---she has huge dark eyes, chubby cheeks, and a pouty lip…kind of reminds me of Lydia. I tried to find out her name, but couldn’t understand their pronunciation without seeing it in writing.

Finally, I tore myself away as it was time to go to another building. Director Yang had arranged for some chefs to teach the girls how to make dumplings. We washed with the tap water (no soap available). My hands were probably cleaner PRIOR to washing with the Fuling water J and headed off to the cafeteria for a meal. We had a lesson on dumpling making and then were served a meal that the nannies had prepared. Jason got a dumpling making demonstration directly from Director Yang. It was some of the best food we’ve had! Dumplings, greens, oranges, fresh vegetables. Even the boys got their tummies full.

Again, I was overwhelmed with the welcome that we were receiving. The orphanage staff was so proud to be hosting us and did an amazing job at serving over 100 people (children included!) AND, that we were allowed to touch, hold, and cuddle those little ones for as long as we wanted…truly amazing, especially since only eight years ago when adoption first began at this orphanage in Fuling, no parents were allowed in, ever, not even when you picked up your child. The relationship between the adoptive parents and the orphanage has grown so much since then.


The most wonderful part of the afternoon, was in the baby room. I was playing with some children when Jason came in with our guide and said that he had found Lydia’s nannies! He said, “These ladies recognized Lydia and said they were her nannies for the last eight months she was here” I couldn’t believe it---finally some REAL info!! These women we did not meet last time…I’m not sure why, but they weren’t presented to us. But today, we met them! Two sweet women…one older lady, and one younger. Lydia was sleeping, but they both talked to her, hugged her, and kissed her. We got lots of pics and when Lydia woke up, we showed them to her. Lydia let them hold her for a while, but then wanted to come back to me. She almost seemed to recognize the younger woman, as she stared at her for an extra long time and then wanted down.


I was overwhelmed to meet them, and showed my gratitude for their care with many hugs and tears. They stroked Lydia’s cheeks and had tears as well. Tears and hugs cross any language barrier and we stood awhile telling them our thanks (the only Chinese words we know).


I think we all left the orphanage with a full heart today. Full of gratitude for being allowed in there, full of sadness for the children who are there, and also full of hope that they will someday find a true family and permanent home.

The Old Orphanage---Lydia’s Finding Place

Another extremely busy afternoon and evening---12 hours of activities with no down time! After lunch, we drove to the old orphanage site…the place where Lydia was found at the front gate at 6 weeks old, and where she lived the next 14 months before we brought her home.

The old orphanage is located in the older section of Fuling, through winding hilly streets. It’s like a maze getting there, and just like last year, the vehicle stopped and someone said “we’re here” and I could hardly believe it, because it seemed as if we were in some yucky alleyway. This time, we approached the gates from the opposite end of the street, so we had a totally different view. As I walked down the hill towards the gates, I looked in at vendors that lined the thin street. A fruit stand, a noodle shop, a seamstress’ shop where she was making bedspreads out of huge flowery pieces of fabric. These aren’t the shop fronts that you might imagine, with large glass windows and pretty entryways. These are basically a room made of cement blocks that opens up into the street, with a metal garage door-like closure. Shabby and bleak, these places look. The fruit is bright and pretty, but some other wares look worn and tattered from sitting on the tables so long without being purchased; then you walk another 10 feet and there is a huge gate. This was Lydia’s first home.

I often wonder how anyone could have left her at the orphanage gate…especially now that I have taken a closer look at the surroundings. The street is very busy, with many people milling about and business taking place. How could she have been left in the middle of all of this without the parents/third party being noticed? At night, I guess. Or, possibly being “found at the orphanage gate” really means that a third party (finder) brought her to the gate and delivered her to the orphanage. The reports don’t say, and I’ve asked but get vague answers---we’ll never know. What I do know is that I can’t imagine my baby being deserted in that dirty street---someone must have been secretly watching to ensure that the orphanage workers found her and took her in rather than some other person taking off with her. It is very puzzling and mysterious, yet I know there are people in this city that know the answers. I would love to be more sleuth-like and find out more, but something holds me back. Either I don’t want to know the truth about her life or possibly I don’t think that these people want to be found…so I ask basic questions, but nothing too invasive, for fear of causing problems.

Because Lydia was with her birth mother for 6 weeks, I imagine that the decision to abandon her was well thought-out and was possibly a tough process for the mother (many babies are found as newborns, some with the umbilical cord still attached). Possibly Lydia’s family was to keep her until they found out she had health issues. I like to imagine that someone was watching for her today (possibly a family member or even her birth-mother) and has been able to catch a glimpse of Lydia; and be comforted to know that she is healthy, happy, and safe. Many people know that we are here…it is in all of the papers and the talk of the city as we are three police escorted buses full of foreigners in this isolated city, so it is possible that they are watching us to see their little girl. I know that if I couldn’t keep my child, to see her face again would be like a dream come true.

We walked around the old orphanage for about an hour, exploring the dirty old building. We got to see much more of it than that last time we were here, but today, the beds are empty and the rooms are cleared of toys and decoration. It is only a skeleton of the place that Lydia knew, as the children are already in the new building up on the mountain.

Lydia ran and played for a long time, not showing ANY recognition of the place at all. I thought she might have some memory or act that something was familiar, but she didn’t and I’m thankful. I hope that she will never remember the lonely days and nights from that place, and will only remember happiness and love and OUR home.

We saw the head nanny that brought Lydia to us last year, she recognized Lydia right away and talked to her for a little while. I had a chance to ask her some more questions and get a few more details about Lydia’s baby months, especially if she had a special nanny that she was attached to, so that we could ask to meet her. I brought out some pictures of Lydia with a nanny that we found on the web, but was told that nanny no longer worked for the orphanage…she left when Lydia was a baby. I was disappointed to have no answers once again, but glad to experience the orphanage leisurely, unlike last time when we were being ushered out quickly.

I’m so thankful that we came! We may never see this place again as it looks right now, and have a little bit clearer picture of Lydia’s babyhood…I always wondered about the nanny in the picture and was disappointed that we didn’t meet her last year. At least now I know that it wasn’t possible.

On to Fuling!

A wonderful welcome into Fuling today! Even our hotel had a banner out front welcoming us to the city.

This morning we were on the bus bright and early for our journey to Fuling, Lydia's birthplace and where she spent the first 14 months of her life. It is a two hour bus ride, which was uneventful; but, as we neared the entrance to the city, we were confused as we pulled over to the side of the road. Soon, we realized that we were pulling over so that we could join our police escort who would lead us into and around Fuling! Director Yang made a surprise appearance on each bus to welcome the girls (and parents) back to Fuling...what a great treat to see her!

Director Yang plays with the children near the river.

The girls pose for photos along the riverwalk.

The police and camermen followed our group around while we viewed the city and Yangtze Riverwalk. Fuling is a city of around 1 million people (small in China terms) and hardly ever sees foreigners, so this is a huge event for the city. Many city officials greeted us as well as we took photos of the River.

Another surprise, the sun is out! Fuling is a city nestled in the mountainous area of Chongqing, where it is cloudy and overcast most of the time. In fact, they said that we must bring happiness and good luck with us because the sun follows us...they have a saying here that "when the sun comes out here, the dogs bark because it is such a stranger." The sun has definately given us a clear view of Fuling...better than we had last year (all foggy and gray).

This afternoon, we visit the old orphanage and drive to the new orphanage up in the hills, and make dumplings in the evening.