The Old Orphanage---Lydia’s Finding Place

Another extremely busy afternoon and evening---12 hours of activities with no down time! After lunch, we drove to the old orphanage site…the place where Lydia was found at the front gate at 6 weeks old, and where she lived the next 14 months before we brought her home.

The old orphanage is located in the older section of Fuling, through winding hilly streets. It’s like a maze getting there, and just like last year, the vehicle stopped and someone said “we’re here” and I could hardly believe it, because it seemed as if we were in some yucky alleyway. This time, we approached the gates from the opposite end of the street, so we had a totally different view. As I walked down the hill towards the gates, I looked in at vendors that lined the thin street. A fruit stand, a noodle shop, a seamstress’ shop where she was making bedspreads out of huge flowery pieces of fabric. These aren’t the shop fronts that you might imagine, with large glass windows and pretty entryways. These are basically a room made of cement blocks that opens up into the street, with a metal garage door-like closure. Shabby and bleak, these places look. The fruit is bright and pretty, but some other wares look worn and tattered from sitting on the tables so long without being purchased; then you walk another 10 feet and there is a huge gate. This was Lydia’s first home.

I often wonder how anyone could have left her at the orphanage gate…especially now that I have taken a closer look at the surroundings. The street is very busy, with many people milling about and business taking place. How could she have been left in the middle of all of this without the parents/third party being noticed? At night, I guess. Or, possibly being “found at the orphanage gate” really means that a third party (finder) brought her to the gate and delivered her to the orphanage. The reports don’t say, and I’ve asked but get vague answers---we’ll never know. What I do know is that I can’t imagine my baby being deserted in that dirty street---someone must have been secretly watching to ensure that the orphanage workers found her and took her in rather than some other person taking off with her. It is very puzzling and mysterious, yet I know there are people in this city that know the answers. I would love to be more sleuth-like and find out more, but something holds me back. Either I don’t want to know the truth about her life or possibly I don’t think that these people want to be found…so I ask basic questions, but nothing too invasive, for fear of causing problems.

Because Lydia was with her birth mother for 6 weeks, I imagine that the decision to abandon her was well thought-out and was possibly a tough process for the mother (many babies are found as newborns, some with the umbilical cord still attached). Possibly Lydia’s family was to keep her until they found out she had health issues. I like to imagine that someone was watching for her today (possibly a family member or even her birth-mother) and has been able to catch a glimpse of Lydia; and be comforted to know that she is healthy, happy, and safe. Many people know that we are here…it is in all of the papers and the talk of the city as we are three police escorted buses full of foreigners in this isolated city, so it is possible that they are watching us to see their little girl. I know that if I couldn’t keep my child, to see her face again would be like a dream come true.

We walked around the old orphanage for about an hour, exploring the dirty old building. We got to see much more of it than that last time we were here, but today, the beds are empty and the rooms are cleared of toys and decoration. It is only a skeleton of the place that Lydia knew, as the children are already in the new building up on the mountain.

Lydia ran and played for a long time, not showing ANY recognition of the place at all. I thought she might have some memory or act that something was familiar, but she didn’t and I’m thankful. I hope that she will never remember the lonely days and nights from that place, and will only remember happiness and love and OUR home.

We saw the head nanny that brought Lydia to us last year, she recognized Lydia right away and talked to her for a little while. I had a chance to ask her some more questions and get a few more details about Lydia’s baby months, especially if she had a special nanny that she was attached to, so that we could ask to meet her. I brought out some pictures of Lydia with a nanny that we found on the web, but was told that nanny no longer worked for the orphanage…she left when Lydia was a baby. I was disappointed to have no answers once again, but glad to experience the orphanage leisurely, unlike last time when we were being ushered out quickly.

I’m so thankful that we came! We may never see this place again as it looks right now, and have a little bit clearer picture of Lydia’s babyhood…I always wondered about the nanny in the picture and was disappointed that we didn’t meet her last year. At least now I know that it wasn’t possible.