Jiě Jie..Mei Mei: Big Sister..Little Sister

Lydia has been waiting for over 14 months to become a big sister.  She loves the boys very much, but they definitely do not appreciate her singing and dancing across the kitchen, pushing baby strollers through the living room, or having to give up ESPN to watch her little girl cartoons.  She is just surrounded by male energy and has longed so much for a sister to share in our girlie interests.

Since she first found out that we were going to bring home Vivian, she has been thinking about the role of being a sister.  "Will she have coffee and dessert with us, Mommy?" (when we are out for a Sunday afternoon treat at the Plaza).  "Will she like to dance like me?" (as we leave her Chinese dance class on Saturdays). "Will she ride Beau with us?" (as we leave the barn from visiting and playing with our horse). "We need to buy her a Halloween costume" (Halloween came and went).  "We need to get her a stocking to hang on the fireplace" (Christmas came and went...twice).

These were the things occupying Lydia's mind while we waited.  It has been difficult for her and also to understand why it has taken so long.  On days when she drew pictures of her and her sister (one purple little girl, and one bigger pink one), she could not fathom why we just couldn't mail the picture to Vivian at the orphanage. Sometimes, the waiting got so long, that she would forget that Vivian was waiting for us too. If I talked about going to China, she would almost seem to ignore me, as if thinking, "Yeah right, you keep saying that. But, she's not here."

What Vivian thought of the Marriott earlier this week.....

She has cried for her, prayed for her, helped me buy things for her, and imagined sharing toys with her.  Her little dream came true when we stepped on the plane to fetch her little sister...such excitement!  We imagined that they would play ball together in the hotel courtyard, that they would run and play in the park, blowing and popping bubbles that Mommy would blow.

But this trip has not been like that....it has been so hard to watch.  Throughout Vivian's sadness and sickness, Lydia is learning what it truly means to be a sister....that it is not all rainbows, hearts, and laughter.  But, many times being a sister means crying, giving, and just being near.  It can mean pain and sadness while you watch them hurt and it means great sacrifice when they need to be put first.

I don't think she ever imagined that being the jie jie would look like this.  I am confident that there will be bubbles, laughter, dollies, and hugs with her sister in the future...I am praying that it is the near future before Lydia gives up on it.  I remind her, "try to touch her arm"..."see if she'll let you hold her hand".  In those moments, it seems that she is also learning what rejection feels like and loving someone anyway....it's tough, but you keep doing it, because you love them.




I am so thankful to say that God gave Lydia such a joyful, forgiving spirit.  She can smile through a dark cloud and push rays of sunshine through to the other side! Despite the frantic pace through airports and government buildings, her sister's sad face and pushing her away, and our worry and care over her sweet mei mei (little sister), her laughter continues to fill the hotel room, taxis, and restaurants wherever we go.  Lydia has loved China, even though it is not necessarily what she imagined it would be.




She has found her Mei Mei and I know she will continue to smile while her sister learns to love...

 

To Lydia, China is pandas, noodles, and people that look like her with black hair.  She has been successful in finding those elements on this trip!  Here she smiles with her beloved pandas.