Chinese Celebration & Dance Recital Tomorrow

Tomorrow is the celebration of the Chinese Dragon Boat Festival in KC at the Plaza. Lydia dances with her group during part of the program. I'm nervous for her. At age 3 she has no idea what a nice event this is, and I hope she doesn't freak out. Also hoping that she remembers her moves as a butterfly and doesn't fly off the stage!

Location: Café Corner, in the Country Club Plaza
– On Ward Parkway betweenJ. C. Nichols and Wyandotte

Date and Time: Saturday, June 12, 2010 10:00 a.m. - 2:30 p.m. The performances begin around noon.

www.kcca-online.org.

I love my boys, but also super happy that I have a little girl :) Smiles and thanks to the Lord, the giver of all perfect gifts (my Lydia).

Imagining Summer...Peace for Moms!

I always wished I could conjure up an imaginary friend like Hobbes. One that would help entertain me and be my partner in crime no matter how scary or lame the adventure. I guess my imagination is not expanded enough to do that though, because no invisible friend ever appeared. I couldn't even manage to give my stuffed animals a personality. I was always sad for myself and envious of little girls who had one (however, now I've learned from my psych friends that the imaginary friend is not such a positive thing from the mental health perspective!)

As the mama of four trying to survive....uh, I mean ENJOY (!)...the summer with my kids, I find myself wishing that they would find some imaginary pal who would respond to their every whim. So far, they think that playmate is ME! For a couple of hours that is okay, but after a few days of the constant noise, requests for games, sports, outdoor craziness, crafts, activities, exploring etc. etc., I have made an announcement...."I am NOT your CLOWN, here to entertain you! Either play with each other, or play by yourself, just keep busy!"....end of lecture. For the first week of summer, that's very revealing, isn't it?

That reminded me of Calvin today and what a great pair he and Hobbes make for summer fun :) My kids are like Calvin, demanding fun and justice for kids (sans the overboard smarty-pants mischievous side, thankfully). But, I'm hoping that they soon realize that I am not the playmate Hobbes. I am rather the frazzled cartoon mother that is usually depicted screaming her head off! I'm praying for 3 months of sustained energy and EXCITEMENT for the summer, without anxiety attacks and gloom :)

Wishing all kids out there, the ability to give their mothers peace, love, and obedience during this joyful summer time. And wishing all my mommy-chics the ability to maintain calmness and kid-like happiness, while enjoying snippets of selfish adult fun every couple of days for these long months :)

If you start talking to an imaginary friend at this point in the game, don't worry....it's okay! Just pull her up a lounge chair, offer her a drink, introduce her to the kids and enjoy yourselves ;)

Boys Becoming...What?

Ugh, my boys are growing up. This is horrifying. For many years, I have worked so hard to shield them from all of the adult yuck...you know...the bad words, the negative attitudes, etc. Now, however, they hear it for them themselves and know what is wrong and are starting to question it. Thus the discussion tonight. While trying to gulp down my lasagna (that they claim is really "sick") they were filling me full of the ideas they have about taboo, or "bad", words.

"Mom, who SAYS those are bad words? I mean they are just words." and "Why does so-and-so or adults say that stuff then?"

This launched into a lengthy discussion about the meaning of the words, not just the phonemes and syllables put together. "So, would you walk by your teacher and say, poop!" "NO!" they said. "Well, then of course, you wouldn't want to say the other word either, right?" They laughed hysterically, and I realized that the conversation was going nowhere, no matter the rationale I proposed.

In the meantime, music is also becoming an issue. As preschoolers, I spent much effort trying to teach them what is truly good music. But lately, they are drawn to what we used to call "junk music."

Sam: "I just love the beat of that. I don't really listen to the words, I just like to feel it."

Yeah, of course, don't we all? He's been trying to convince me to download some Black Eyed Peas, or you know, some AC/DC or Def Leppard? I truly can't believe that I am facing this...I used to picture my boys at age 10, playing the piano, enjoying Chaucer and chess, with Mozart wafting through my house. Now, we are struggling to even think about picking up a book, yearning for a funky beat, and even starting to talk about GIRLS...and chess? No patience for that. UGH!? Did I also mention that they both need to wear deodorant, because they truly reek on a sweaty day? It is just horrifying...my little boys are disappearing before my eyes and turning into pseudo-adolescents. I can't take it.

All the while, I'm wondering what will become of me. Just now, Sam brought me his IPod and instructed me to download some cool tunes before camp...."You know mom, just pick out some cool things that Dad likes." Yikes...I'm in trouble!

Never a Dull Moment...Someone, Please Give Me a Dull Moment!

If I ever say that I am bored, someone please slap me...okay? The one thing that it will NEVER be, in my home, is boring. We seem to attract drama and excitement as if it were being reserved totally for us. Tonight was no exception. Let's start by saying that the LS police just left...again! This time, super friendly and eager to help. Very polite and BRAVE, I might add.

Before I explain their assignment at the Kemper home tonight, I will add the prelude of Easter/Spring trauma that had just occured in our yard. After a long and exhausting day of transporting mini-Kempers all over the city and meeting with professionals aimed at alleviating my stresses, we came home to fetch Katie before the next minivan run, only to find that she had used a baby bunny (or several) as tennis balls....tossing them up and down, playing fetch, ripping them to shreds, etc., as my mortified children looked on.

Somehow, I managed to convince them that the bunnies must have already been deceased before Katie found them and that then they were fair game (literally). We traveled on, to retrieve the next Kemper kid...

Nearly 6:00, we were home...ready to begin the dinner and bedtime ritual so that this tired Mommy could have some peace and quiet. But no! No peace for the diligent Mom. Arrival at home was the next doozy. I pulled up to the drive, expecting to retrieve my mail as usual. Opened the mailbox (which has been bashed in on the side by punks, btw) and stuck my hand in.....whoa! Wait a minute...What is that nicely placed on my medical bills, junk flyers, and birthday greetings? Is that a fuse? Is that an explosive-looking thing? Why, yes! Yes it is. Remove the hand and gently close the door....I calmly pull into the driveway and say, "Well kids, dinner will have to wait...take the dog out and go in the house. I need to call the police."

Then all chaos hits, "The police!? Why mom? What's in the mailbox?! A dead rabbit?" Me (with that sweet mommy voice): "No children, no dead bunnies in the mailbox (smile)...only explosives!!!!" Then lots of excitement, speculation, and fantasy.

I must say, my LS PD were very attentive and eager to help when I informed them that something strange was in my mailbox...I could almost SEE the guy on the other end of the phone...he slammed down his Diet Coke, grabbed his pen, sat up straighter in his seat, and furiously began taking down details. Wow some real action! I did make it clear that they appeared to look like fireworks; however, I wasn't taking any chances. Just for the reader to know--I DID consider touching it, just to see what would happen (I tend to be like that); but I refrained as I imagined headlines quoting that a mother's face was blown off as she couldn't resist touching the mystery bomb in her mailbox.

Anyway, two very nice officers arrived soon to get the scoop...I did notice that they parked down the street (just in case?). As soon as I described the contents of my mailbox, p.o. #1 announced that he must call in someone else (the bomb squad!?) I was imagining the headlines. They gathered details and took on the "this is serious" look and voice (they must be taught that in training) "Stay in your house ma'am, until I give the all clear." um...okay, I already opened the box, closed it, but now I'm secured in front of my dining room window...check!

After a few minutes, I saw the two guys digging into the mailbox! They must have been like me, and couldn't resist to see what it was. And, it was as I had described to them....two bottle rockets, laying nicely in an X pattern on a square package that appeared to be firecrackers....but one never knows.

They came back a few minutes later..."Whoa, that's a big dog..." and handed me my mail. "You couldn't help looking in there, could you?" I said. They smiled nervously, like two little boys who were itching for some excitement...and were disappointed that they found none. In the future, please know, that when you describe "no liquids and no wires" that is a clear indicator that you probably have fireworks in your mailbox instead of bomb :) They assured me that I did the right thing in calling them out...I was happy to give them some measly excitement for the evening.

As I closed the door, I breathed a sigh of relief. My kids hadn't caused the police to come, and we were all safe. I loved on Katie for putting on a good "watchdog" show for the PD (and not making an utter fool of herself with senseless barking), while thinking that the momentum of the structured evening was totally ruined. Katie replied with a huge kiss...right on my mouth. Immediately though, all warm and fuzzy feelings ceased, when I realized that a clump of bunny fuzz was clinging to her lip! Nice....No, never boring around here...survived another day in fact.

A Dog Tale (kind of)

I know it can be absolutely dreadful to read about other peoples’ pets. Constantly making animals the topic of your material can be boring and totally unbearable for the reader; however, my pet is exactly what has prompted me to write today. So, in my attempt to be interesting, I will try to write from the human perspective, with Katie as a prop (a huge prop, by the way).

A few nights ago, I was rescued from boredom and the overwhelmed-ness of kids by Jason’s suggestion to go for a walk. Not just any walk though, but “The First Walk of Spring!” I rarely walk in the winter months because my hands and toes can’t tolerate it (old lady-ish, I know). But, the snow has entirely melted, the birds are singing, and one only needs a light fleece to be comfortable...the perfect evening. I will also add, that on that day, we were making huge efforts to keep Katie’s ears up….it seems that the outdoors (specifically, sunshine) really keeps her droopy ear up (with all of the nature to listen for, etc). So, Jason’s suggestion was not entirely focused on keeping me alive via good health habits, he was mainly hoping to get Katie some good exercise and interest her ears in staying pointy.

Nevertheless, I anticipated the rare solitary moment to think and reflect (that’s what I do on walks, by the way… solve problems and dream). I geared up with my UnderArmor gloves, choke chain with reflective leash, and music…that’s where I hit a snafu. Despite what you might suspect, I can think best if my auditory system is occupied by melodies, harmonies, and lyrics… extraneous, abrupt noises of the neighborhood distract me. If nature were my only companion, that might be fine; but, the sounds of cars, power tools, and people milling about, robs me of the solitude that I’m seeking. Music cancels it out.

You would think that the music wouldn’t be the problem in going for a walk. Finding your shoes or collecting the dog, maybe; but not scrounging some tunes. Alas, the “adult” MP3 (i.e. Jason’s) had a run-down battery. My next option was to borrow Sam’s. Now, I’m not that techie with these new devices. I spent about 15 minutes trying to upload some of my songs and thought that I had them.

So, Katie and I started out….walking her is no small feat…it is like a whole body workout, for sure. Eighty pounds of mass pulling you down the sidewalk, while you are trying earnestly to teach her some walking manners (makes for nice sore calves and quads). That alone sapped some of my joy. She expects to begin with a full run (and her “run” is like my sprint)….poor girl has to slow to a crawl so that my small stride can keep up with her. In order to make her heel, I have to wrap the leash around my wrist three times, then wrap it under my elbow and hold it tight with the other hand (creates nice bulging forearms and biceps, though…and I think even some lower back soreness, as it tweaks the muscles connecting the lumbar vertebrae). This walking posture is definitely not ergonomic, for sure!

Dog and I finally got in a groove after the first block. Then I set my attention on the iPod….why was I only hearing an elderly woman reading “A Wrinkle In Time”? Where were my songs!? Books on Tape were not going to get me through this walk. While de-tangling myself from the leash and keeping the dog from dragging me into mailboxes and stop signs, I began frantically pushing the ‘advance’ button…only to find that my songs were nowhere! Two choices (three actually): go home, continue and listen to 10 year-old selections, or continue and listen to environmental sounds. Not wanting to disappoint the dog, nor return to my abode, I chose Sam’s iPod. Katie and I proceeded to trudge along to: The City of Prague Philharmonic (Star Wars theme songs), Camille Saint Saëns (gloomy-suspense type classical), Haydn’s Symphony Nos. 94 and 101, and (lastly and strangely) Pink Floyd (per Jason). Pink Floyd is so creepy in several different ways (definitely not exercising music).

I was beside myself that these were my options, but then realized that Saint Saëns and Star Wars songs can be a nice backdrop for pondering AND walking. The suspenseful parts were a bit creepy as I strolled along in the dark….I kept feeling that I was waiting for something climactic to happen! But, my trusty guard dog soon fell into place beside me, keeping stride with our action-packed classical tempo (I’m sure there’s some musical term for that). She has proven herself to be a good walking companion…she doesn’t talk to me or interrupt my thoughts, she watches out for weirdos, and she doesn’t mind the music ;)

The Wizard of Caponium

The sky was an icy blue, with honey-colored sunbeams dripping through the clouds, as we visited the Land of Caponium.  Here Jack was on the search for the wizard (a.k.a. Dr. Capone) to magically fix his eyes and allow him to return home.  The search was long and Jack met several interesting characters along the way.  Many provided a distraction from boredom, but none could lead us to the elusive Wizard of Caponium....he could not be found for several long hours.  

In his travels, Jack used his trusty blue bubble hat ("the prophetic hat," as he called it) to give him special powers.  With his hat attached to his bum, Jack trudged through the vine-encrusted jungle, floated through thick puffy green clouds, battled a wacky iguana, and outsmarted a tricky elephant.  Finally, Jack met two fair maidens who knew the way to the wizard.  In order to reach the wizard, however, the boy Jack must release all communication with his parents and fall into a deep sleep....there he will meet The Wizard of Caponium, who will grant his wish--to eliminate the pars planitis.  Only the wizard knows the magical spell to conquer the gunk with cryo-surgery.  Jack is brave and strong!  He is confident that the wizard is the one to help him.  He places the prophetic hat upon his head, kisses his mother, and floats away on the bed with wheels to breathe the strawberry gas that will transport him out of the Land of Caponium!

This is the story that I created to help ease Jack's worries and pass the time while he waited to be wheeled back to surgery.  I made the story hilariously funny (including boy humor and sound effects) without caring who heard me or thought I was a crazy mom.  It worked...Jack was laughing so hard that he almost fell off the rack and I think for a moment, he forgot about why we were there.  Laughter about totally ridiculous, unrealistic scenes (and little boy funnys) swept us away from the sadness and uncertainty of the situation.

The end result...the eye drops we've been using the past 4 weeks have helped.  Some of the junk in there has settled (Dr. used the analogy of a snowglobe, that had previously been shaken and was now settled).  However, cryo-surgery was still needed because the steroid drops can't be continued much longer without different types of issues forming.  He used a cryo-probe that is pressed against the lower white surface of the eye (where the snowdrift is) and freezes the eye within, making sort of "ice balls" around the gunk.

Jack woke up well, with his lower eyelids seriously puffy and he again looked so pathetic.  The eyelids were numbed to prevent pain, so then he couldn't open them at all.  We were in recovery for a long time, because he had an anesthesia headache for quite a while and slept and slept. 

One of the most sad things I've seen in my Mommy-life so far.. the falling of a blood-stained tear from my little boy's unopened eyes.  

Tonight he is back to his normal self, has his appetite back ("No Mom, the adult menu please.  The kid menu is not an option").  We have to lead him around like he is blind.  Also, he is a bit worried that other people "think something's wrong with him."  The eyeballs are so swollen (and bloody) that he really can't open them that well, and it's not a pretty sight!  He caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror and almost gagged : (

Soon the eyes will heal, though.  Our trip to The Land of Caponium was a success....eyedrops will continue for several more weeks and then we hope for uneventful health.  It was not comforting when the anesthesiologist inquired if he has an autoimmune disorder, and then proceeded to educate his resident that this type of case is usually accompanied by that....I shrugged and had a lame explanation of "unknown."  The look on his face told me that maybe he knew something I didn't.  But I can't worry about it now.  Dr. Capone said there are no tests for finding out that kind of thing and really no treatment either.  So, I guess you just live your life and pray that Jack will avoid those diseases.  Only the ulitmate Healer knows the answers to those questions...no wizards, no magical lands, just real life....Jack is tough and we are ready.  Thanks to God for a successful trip and for providing the answers we needed to intervene with this eye disease.

Spring Break in Detroit

The sun is shining and school is out for the week; but no waves, no sand, no palm trees for us. Spring Break for Jack is the Motor City....except the only excitement for him will be the Detroit airport and Beaumont Hospital :(

Beware the Jabberwocky

His bright green eyes look at her sadly, his head tilted to the side in thought,

"You were much muchier, " he says, "you've lost your muchness."

Alice looks at him, puzzled; either wondering what his poetic language is referring to, or actually pondering where she lost her muchness. In this scene, the Mad Hatter tried to remind Alice of who she used to be, when she had high hopes, aspirations...when she was driven by her strength. Sadly, he realizes that she doesn't remember him or the laughs they had once shared. Now, when she visits Wonderland again, she has forgotten herself. She is uncertain of who she is....Is she even the right Alice? Her muchness has been swallowed up by what others want her to be....her strength has been sapped by trying to please others.

In Wonderland, nothing is impossible, most things are shocking, and the weird is strangely a comfort and there to help you. And in the end, Alice re-discovers who she is....her "muchness" returns and she slays the enemy (Jabberwocky).

I'll bet you can guess what movie we just enjoyed? The new Alice in Wonderland was wonderful; a nice extension of Lewis Carroll's superb literary accomplishment, portraying an older and wiser Alice, yet an Alice that is still looking to find who she is. She has lost her spunk and self-confidence.....but discovers herself amidst the confusion and struggle.

I love this conquering girl, and Mad Hatter's freaky dedication and confidence in his friend. I sat there strangely relating to Alice. She represents that part in all of us, that is struggling to be free from the confines of conformity. I think I used to be "much muchier" than I am now, feeling lost in strangeness...waiting for my "muchness" to return, without having to tumble down a rabbit-hole or slay a dragon ;)

Tossing Around Thoughts...Jack and Pars Planitis

I always know that I shouldn't browse around the web for medical details; however, the vast knowledge out there is just so irresistible. I can't help it! Jack's eye problem has not miraculously vanished. We continue to put in 6 drops a day (with the help of our wonderful 1st grade teacher) and we fly to Detroit next week to have his surgery done (cryopexy, I believe). It is not better, I can tell. Just over the weekend, Sam was marveling at an Apache helicopter flying through the sky..."Wow, look at those guns Jack!" Jack.."where?! I don't see it!" Aww...it was right up there in plain view, but he just saw blue sky.

So, despite my best efforts to remain optimistic and avoid any unnecessary stress, I have been researching the pars planitis....as I suspected, the digging around has opened up a whole new world of strange ideas. I'm not really a "worrier" about this kind of stuff. I truly believe that "whatever is, is..." BUT I do like to be prepared for any freakishness, just in case the dreadful events in life, do in fact, happen to me. Here's a link that explains the most recent thinking on treatment for Jack's eye condition (if interested).

MERSI Ocular Immunology and Uveitis Foundation Medical Professionals Articles Case Reports


What continues to bother me, though is the frequent mention of systemic disease that is often associated with this eye condition. MS and sarcoidosis are the most common and those don't sound very nice for my 7 year old :(

Do I worry? Not really, I guess. I just get over-irritable about the petty things in life that other people present to me each day. When dealing with stressful moments in life like this, it makes trivial decisions such as "paper or plastic" so much more maddening! I want to grab the smiley girl by the collar and holler, "Who cares!? I'm just trying to keep my head on straight! Just put my food in a bag....any bag!" Or how about a student, who wants to debate a couple of missed points on a quiz...."Two points?! You must be kidding me...life is so much bigger than that!" I want to yell. But, I don't. In fact, I don't consciously think about these daily frustrations and my current struggles all too often. These thoughts are really in my subconscious all throughout the day, I guess...just floating around. And then it occasionally just bubbles up (after I search another Harvard Med School website, I suspect), and an innocent question from the grocery gal leaves me wanting to freak out!

Do I sound irritable? Maybe so. One gets that way when her children are suffering through things that she can't do anything about. The world moves on, choosing paper or plastic, while she carries the invisible weight around. It sits on her shoulders, peering over her head while she reads about possible future health issues. She sighs, pushes the heavy feelings down, and drags herself to visit the subconscious place found in sleep, where she tries to sort it all out. Today's struggles are the backdrop for the dream world, where feelings are rearranged and solutions are possible :)

Tomorrow is another day, and struggle or not, God is there on the winding path with me. I think I will avoid the medical sites until after next week.....

Doggie Dilemmas

I seriously think that my dog is depressed. I don't know what else to call it. Despite the fact that she is an outstanding dog, her fabulous bloodlines appear tainted at times...you see, as a German Shepherd breed, her ears are guaranteed to be up, pointy and, you know, German Shepherd- looking. But frequently (and recently, all the time) only one ear is pointy and the other ear just flops down to the side. It makes her look kind of sad, or even like (should I say it?)...a mutt.

I must first say, that Katie is an outstanding dog, bred for good looks and temperament. She is beautiful, and extremely obedient. She understands her masters and will do whatever we say (she even obeys the 3 year old). "Come here, sit, lay down, go away, stop sniffing me!, etc" She is the most obedient dog I've seen (for as little training as we are able to put into her). In addition, she keeps us active. We are never at a loss for things to do, because she drags so much dirt and hair around the house, that dusting and vacuuming have become a daily chore. Also, we are constantly seeking ways to keep her entertained. She loves to play tag and hide-n-seek in the house. And she can demolish $20 worth of doggie toys in less than 10 minutes (I'm totally serious about that). No rubber or stuffed toy is safe. And, the girl is a serious food disposal---she can tear up hock bones, deer meat, and fresh salmon faster than you can blink.

Back to the point, Katie's ears are the topic of frequent conversation around here. "Gee girl, get your ears up, you look like a sissy." or "Aww look, her ears are down. Is she exhausted?" and just recently, "I totally think that she is sad, the one ear is just droopy all the time." On a walk, it is just plain embarrassing if your GSD has sloppy ears!

It seems very odd that with so many other pressing topics to discuss, we will mope around and lament about a dog's ears. However, just like anything amiss with your own children, you worry about your dog and if something is wrong. No one else will understand this of course, because just like your children, no one else can comprehend or love them like you do.

As a plus, she does have a written "guarantee" that her ears will be up by a certain age. Jason teased her last night and told her we wanted our money back....poor girl, I'm sure she was totally insulted. I thought about that and how ridiculous it is....that you would take an animal into your family, let her sleep at your feet, eat from your plate, allow her to protect your butt, and then say "no good, I'd like a refund please." It's ludicrous...we would never return her!

Last night, it became so distressing (the floppy ear) that we began to google solutions to her auricle (you can fix it you know, with a bit of masking tape and a spongy pink curler). It seems simple enough. Insert the pink spongy curler into the ear so that it stands upright, then tape it up....I just can't see how she would tolerate that. And instead of a nice pointy ear, I would find the pink blob shredded to bits around the house.

This morning however, I was relieved to see that both ears were up (and for a long time). After romping and sprinting through the icy backyard like a crazed beast, she came in, ears up and pointy, ready for the world. Thus, my theory....she is depressed by this winter weather and is longing for the green and outdoor activities of Spring...sick of being cooped up in this house and was refreshed this morning to hear the birds singing their spring-like song.

So, I will save the worrying for another day and test this theory. By the end of April, if the floppy ear isn't 100% perfect, out comes the spongy pink curler! I feel your pain pup, I am yearning for the sun to warm my skin and the earth to give forth new life. Soon, we will run and play in the fresh green grass. Don't worry Katie-girl, floppy ear or not, you are ours forever...guarantees are crazy...nothing in life can be guaranteed.

Lydia's dance recital at the Nelson Atkins Museum of Art: CNY Celebration. For a 3 year old, she was fabulous! No tears, paid attention, remembered most of the moves, did not fall down, and no costume mishaps...yea! Check out the cutest bunny at center stage :)

Xin Nian Kuai Le (新年快乐) Happy Chinese New Year!

Me: "What do you want to wear to church today Lydia?"
Her: "Pants and a shirt, like the boys!"
Ugh...I thought...this is not good.
Me: "Oh don't you remember, it's Chinese New Year! Why don't you wear some of your Chinese clothes?"
Me: "Chinese New Year? Yea! Yes, I will wear my Chinese clothes."

Whew, a sigh of relief. The Year of the Tiger begins on a happy note in the Kemper house. Well, not really I guess...if you count that we never actually made it to church, due to: late showers, spending too much time fluffing freshly washed girlie hair, ironing boys' shirts, searching the house for belts and shoes...and, oh yes Jason tripped on a toy on the staircase, sprained his ankle, and proceeded to ruin the spiritual atmosphere with very dramatic ranting.

We piled into the van at exactly 10:05, which means already LATE for church, and we weren't even there yet. I really dislike being late. I mean really...especially when it is impossible to make a covert entrance. People at our church insist on filling the pews from the back...meaning any late comers have to file up to the front, making a very noticable and dramatic arrival. I just can't do it.

All dressed up, nowhere (on-time) to go...I seriously thought about driving around town until we found a church that didn't start until 11:00. However, an unfamiliar church is similar to being late (in how it makes you feel), so the ultimate decision was made...(terrible)...we instead headed down to PF Chang's (shh, don't tell our pastor that we skipped and instead indulged in lettuce wraps and shrimp wontons!)

All spiritual mindset was not lost, however. Serious theological discussion did take place in the van (about what, I can't remember). But, the most meaningful moment was Sam's description of the time Moses had to hold up his arm/staff in order for the Isrealites to win the battle. If he put his arm down, they would start to lose. And his arm was so tired that Joshua and Aaron had to hold it up for him, so that they wouldn't perish!

Ah, the lesson of the day...straight from the 9 year old...persist and do what you are supposed to do, God will hold you up, and He will work it out and fight the battles for you. In the end, you will succeed in what he has given you. You may get tired, you may stumble, you may feel like quitting...but God has the plan, and you have a job to do.


Wishing you much good fortune in the Year of the Tiger...also prosperity, persistence, and punctuality ;)

New Day, New Diagnosis

Today was filled with more surprises (nothing earth shattering), but actually the news is better about Jack's eye condition!   

On Monday, Dr. Capone was certain that the condition was a genetic disorder which results in deterioration of the retina due to a shortage (or lack of) the "glue" substance that the body creates to hold the retina layers together.  This condition is passed from mothers to their sons, thus all of my boys might have been affected, and my nephews/male cousins as well.  There is no treatment/cure for this eye disease and leads to a lifetime of vision problems that cannot be corrected to 20/20.  AND, doc told Jack that he could never play contact sports :(  BUT, call off those eye doctor appts, sisters!  This diagnosis is no longer!

Jack had a fitful sleep last night.  He tossed and turned and talked out.  At one time, he was having a conversation with someone in the dream  world and was explaining his eye problem to them..."Glasses will be good for me, but they won't help me" he told them.  :( 

The purpose of today's visit to the surgical center was for Dr. Capone to confirm his suspicions by viewing jack's eyes while under anesthesia.  After he put Jack under, he came out and discussed more thoroughly the ultrasound pictures that they had taken on Mon and gave a more confident explanation that he was sure it was X-linked Retinoschesis.  He was going to take more pictures and look more closely at the extent of the damage to the retina.  I sat there watching the other sleepy parents.  One couple looked distraught after Dr. Capone talked to them, others dozed.  I'm not sure what we looked like....on our first trip, the front desk workers asked us if we were from out of the country (?!)....was it our "look" or our accent that gave it away?  Wonder where they thought we were from...did we look Euro or Canadian? :)

To my surprise, Dr. Capone emerged again after only about 15 minutes and called us back to a private room.  He had a look of concern and I started to worry a bit.  His first words, "Well, it wasn't what I thought it was." was actually somewhat comforting and also freaky at the same time.  "It is not the genetic disorder that I've been describing to you in detail for the past 2 days, but it does present with similar visual characteristics." I realized later that his look of concern, was really a bit of embarrassment that he had misdiagnosed in the first place.

SO, enter diagnosis #2, which is:  Intermediate Uveitis, or more specifically Pars Planitis.  It is an idiopathic (unidentified cause), very uncommon, condition in which the body begins to attack itself and causes an inflammatory response, in this case, in the eye.  The result is a haze in the gel that fills the eye, and inflammatory debris settles in the bottom portion of the eyeball, creating a "snowbank" look and also cystic-like changes in the retina layers (which was similar to the other disorder).  Bottom line, the debris causes the blurry vision and the cysts created the initial retinal bleed...AND, the "snowbank" must be eliminated to prevent more damage.

The good news...my other boys and the rest of my family are not affected and there is treatment for this condition.  AND, more great news, this disorder, once treated, will be gone with no residual vision loss (hopefully, any recurrence is treated successfully with drops) And, he can play sports :) The not so great news is the treatment.  He's starting with steroid drops 6x a day (they sting), and then Jack must return here in 6 weeks to see if the "snowbank" has dissolved or decreasing...at that time Dr. Capone will probably do procedures on both eyes to get rid of the junk in there...they freeze it out!  So, all around this is a more positive diagnosis, but with a bit of upcoming discomfort.

Jack emerged from the anesthesia just fine; however, his eyes were a bit sore.  He looked so pathetic laying there, not able to open his eyes :(  Dr. Capone felt very badly that he had told Jack, "no pain today"....but then when he was in there and checking the underneath side (and saw the snowbank) he had to prod and squeeze on his eyeball a bit to get a better view...ouch!

In all, our doc was SO thorough and quite humble in explaining the new information to us.  He spent more time with us than any other doctor has...ever, I think.  What a great experience we have had here...I'm so thankful :)

Thanks for all of the prayers everyone!  We have received what we came for, and that is a proper diagnosis and plan for treatment.  The goal then, is to eliminate the present cause and prevent further damage.  Detroit, we'll be back in 6 weeks...please no snow next time.

Passing the Time

The time here has been going more quickly than I thought.  Monday, our appt lasted most of the morning and then Jack was super-antsy.  We found a bowling alley nearby and then went to the mall.  We thought he would really enjoy the time alone with us...but he's being CRAZY!  I think he is trying to take in the eye problems and what the doc has told us so far.   We've also crept him into the fitness center to help release some energy! 

Today, we went down to the lobby to play cards and watch the snow swirl around the windows....that was after we aborted our trip to the Henry Ford Museum and scarcely made it back to the safety of our lodging.  We started out with high hopes...to see some cars (woo hoo).  But, as we got further into downtown, cars were flying all over the highway, smashing into the sidewalls.  Despite my best efforts to remain calm, the high-pitched complaining emerged.  I couldn't believe that we were risking our lives to go to a museum.  On a normal snowy day, I don't even leave my house except in emergencies.  Much to my surprise, Jason agreed to turn back.  About ten minutes at crawling speed on smaller highways and side streets, the radio announced that I-94 (our previous path) was now closed due to a huge pile-up and flipped semi.....a narrow (and harrowing) escape!

Today, a two hour nap and tonight, The Office :)  to the hospital at 6:45 in the morning for more testing under anesthesia.  They took our blood on Mon to do some genetic workups....hey, I didn't know I would need tests...needles aren't my favorite.  Honestly, if they could seep the liquid out of my retinas to put into his, I would do it in an instant.  If it were only that simple...it appears there is no fix for this problem.  I will work tomorrow on explaining it more thoroughly....now off to sleep.

Flashback...Travels With Technology

On our second day of travel (from Springfield to Detroit) I got really good with Jason's Droid.  Google maps and GPS location finder are totally cool, but takes a little practice to add-in points of interest or to veer off the path (and not get lost).  I sadly tossed out the printouts from MapQuest at the next gas station break (that is so 2007-2008, I guess).  Beforehand feeling so prepared, I now realized that I was a waster of tree pulp and totally out-of-date. 

As the GPS co-pilot, I was intent on keeping us on target for the final destination; but my propensity to veer off the plan often crept up.  I would see an intruiging billboard boasting the finest little winery in southern Michigan, or even better, the one that said "Chocolate Garden---next exit, then left 1 mile"  Now, I'm not really a chocolate lover, but anyplace that combines the names of tastiness and beauty in one title, must have something sweet and irrestible to look at and consume.  When I mentioned it though, the guys in the car only moaned. Jason did pretend to be somewhat interested (at least for a few seconds)..."Do you really want me to exit?" He must have been clued in when I said "Chocolate Garden, next exit" ??   I pretty soon figured out the male ploy to avoid the time-delay.  You know, "the Dad-trucker-style-traveler" emerges covertly, which is "don't stop until you get there."  He hesitates, and continues the speed limit, until we get right to the exit.  "Here it is!" I yell. "What?  This one? Are  you sure?" ....all the while, we blow past it....so wrong.  I see the secret smile..."Oops, did you want to go there?" he says, and happily keeps on.

I did manage to get off the path in Ann Arbor....the crucial place one MUST go to when in MI, and that is Zingerman's Deli.   I have several times sent Zing's yummy deli-style gift baskets, but never had the chance to taste the to-die-for food myself.  "We HAVE to stop at Zingerman's!" I plead....I snatched up the Droid (which now was becoming my fast friend) and poked in a search for Z's.  The diversion from the Interstate was clearly so easy that even Jack could navigate his way there, so they only complained a bit.  I tried to entice by oozing about the imported cheeses, the fantastic home-baked breads and sweet treats, and the New York style deli sandwiches (made to order and to perfection).  We found the deli, no problem, and emerged with on a few embarrassed complaints from them as I pulled out the camera.  Boy, did their attitudes change when they viewed all of the luscious food offerings!  We managed to taste nearly everything of worth in the Deli, and came away with a basket full of yummys to eat at the hotel:  creamy French Gouda, Italian hard salami, a fresh-baked crusty baguette, a nosher-sized sourcream coffeecake, and a pile of heavenly brownies.  My dream, to eat at the infamous Zingerman's...fulfilled :)

The Droid brought us all the way from KC to our hotel lobby with no issues (Jason only argued with it one time) and since then, we have used it all over Detroit....can I even remember the days of planning a roadtrip with a paper map?  I tried to get Jack interested in plotting his route with a marker on a real map, "Why would I do that? I can see us moving right on the screen.  Aren't we the little blue dot moving along the purple line?"  That seems wrong.  Will my little guy ever learn to read a map or plan a route on his own, or will his sense of direction always be governed by an electronic droid-friend?  If his satellite crashes, then what?  I love the technology, but totally believe in the old-school method...just as accurate, only takes a little longer (and some brain power).  Seems a bit wrong to avoid thinking about how you will get somewhere...perhaps Jack's generation will grow into early-dementia from lack of brain use...relying too much on technology.  Anyway, we got here no problem...that's the point I guess :))